Since You Asked…

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Dear Caroline,

Last week I was visiting two friends, an older couple. I’m single and 35; they are in their seventies. We talked late into the night, drank too much wine and I made a horrible mistake.

You see, they own two parrots. Somehow, the conversation wandered to those birds and their long lifespans. The parrots, my friends said, are about my age and will probably live to be 75.

That’s where the conversation went downhill. Long story short, I somehow agreed to inherit the parrots and care for them after my friends pass away. 

Today those friends called me to say they’re going to make an appointment with their lawyer to amend their will.

Now that I’m sober, I don’t want to inherit those birds!


…Pentinent about Parrots

Dear Penitent,

Calm down. You didn’t commit a murder, cause a fatal accident or wake up with a questionable tattoo. Making a promise you can’t keep is bad behavior, but it can be undone.

Apologize to your friends immediately.

Tell them that after reflecting on the situation, you have decided you’re not equipped to give those parrots the level of care and companionship they need and deserve.

Your friends may be in their seventies, but it sounds like they have a lot of life left in them. They’ll find the perfect parrot parents.

Hope you learned from this fowl faux pas.


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